It's no secret that mainstream Mormonism used to practice plural marriages. In fact, their official statement of polygamy is...
"The Bible and the Book of Mormon teach that the marriage of one man to one woman is God’s standard, except at specific periods when He has declared otherwise." -Plural Marriage and Families in Early Utah (www.lds.org)
The story goes like this. Back in the early 1840s, Mormonism was under a lot of persecution. Mormon were being either killed or jailed, leaving more women than Priesthood holders. Since a temple marriage to a priesthood holder is needed for salvation and exaltation, something needed to be done. God then spoke to Joseph Smith and allowed the Saints to begin the practice of polygamy. This practice was done for around 50 years until President Woodruff stated he would follow the letter of the law and he un-instituted plural marriages. However, they were still done and sanctioned by the LDS church for another 14 years after that, "on an exceptional basis...especially in Mexico and Canada, outside of the jurisdiction of U.S. law; a small number of plural marriages were performed within the United States during those years."
This is when the Fundamentalist Mormons came about. These people did not want to stop practicing plural marriages because they felt that the doctrine came straight from God, and no earthly law trumps God's. These people practice polygamy to this day and strive to follow all Joseph Smith's prophecy and teachings. However, they are not to be confused with mainstream Mormonism, the guys who come to your door on bicycles.
Though I have much to say on the fact that Mormonism still practiced polygamy in the states after it was made illegal (even though most Mormons will argue they stopped immediately after it was made illegal), or the fact that the LDS church allowed people - including Joseph Smith - to marry other women who already had husbands or girls as young as 14 years old (utlm.org for more info), I'm not going to. I've left the link should you decide to do some of your own research. Instead, I will target their claim that God allowed for plural marriages in the Bible and refute the idea.
The Bible VS Polygamy
Whenever I've asked Mormons about the practice of plural marriage, they always roll their eyes. It's like the topic has become old hat and most have become calloused to. Most of the time, their go to answer to shut any further discussion down is how God condoned his prophets for entering into polygamous relationships. The most common examples Mormons reference is either Abraham or King David. And if one is not even decently familiar with their Bible, they may have lost an opportunity to share the gospel. So allow me to give you some Biblical context to their argument.
Sarai was getting anxious as she was not bearing any children for Abram, and she blamed God for it (Gen 16:2). So, she took matter into her own hands and gave her handmaid Hagar to Abram. [It is important to note that God didn't tell her to do this, she did it on her own out of impatience. Nowhere in scripture is it said that God spoke to her and told her to do this, nor does it say that Abram was told by God to take Hagar as his mistress.] Abram gave in to his wife's pleadings and slept with Hagar and she bore a son, Ishmael, when Abram was 86 years old. 13 years later, God changed his (Gen 17:5) and his wife's name (Gen 17:15) and then told Abram "I will make thee exceeding fruitful, and I will make nations of thee, and kings shall come out of thee" (Gen 17:6-7). Then, Abraham and Sarah had Isaac, whom the nation of Israel was from. Then, due to jealousy, Sarah demanded that Abraham dismiss Haggar and Ishmael, which grieved Abraham but God said that he would bless them both but to listen to his wife and send them away (Gen 21:12-13). [Now, historically speaking, Ishmael's descendants became modern day Iraq, Afghanistan, Iran, etc. and other Muslim nations]. So, while God did bless Abraham and keep his covenant with His people, Abraham's impatience and questioning God led to the creation of a people that have been battling His people for years.
In King David's case, it was coveting that brought about polygamy, not God. 2 Samuel 11 tells of the time that King David looked upon Bathsheba with lust, arranged for an adulterated meeting, where she became pregnant. Instead of coming clean, he designed a way to have her husband, Uriah, one of King David's champion soldiers to be killed, so that he could hide his sin from the world. "But the thing that David had done displeased Jehovah" (2 Sam 11:27b).
Both of these, and all the other examples of polygamy you might find in the Bible, are hardly examples of God being "okay" with polygamy. Nowhere in these or any other story shows God condoning polygamy. God never commands anyone to marry multiple women, or a woman to an already married man. God made it clear in Genesis how He designed marriage - one man, one woman (Gen 2:22-24).
The truth is, God does not agree with polygamy. Not now, not back in Biblical times, not ever. The Bible says that God never changes (Num 23:19, Heb 13:8, James 1:17), which means neither does His laws or His views. When God created the world, He made one man for one woman. Period. Mankind is the one who introduced polygamy. Mankind is the one who tried to bend the rules. Man is responsible for this perversion of marriage, not God. In my opinion, the Mormon era of polygamy was created because a lot of men were deviants. They wanted more than what God had in store for them, and when they found themselves in a position of power they abused it. They allowed their own selfish desires to control them and led their followers into destructive lifestyles, all in the name of "righteousness".
If you're Mormon, I hope this shakes you to your core. You have been lied to and deceived. Joseph Smith, Brigham Young, and the other prophets were not following God when they decreed polygamy to be permissible by God. That is simply not true.
If you are not Mormon, I hope this has given you a bit more to talk to your Mormon friends about. Let this be a gateway into heavier conversations about the true God and His gospel. Use this information to spread the good news of His glory and bring more lost sheep into His fold.
Lastly, if there is something you can take away, let it be this: Bad things happen to those who go against God's design. Sarah found that out the hard way. So did Abraham. So did David. So have countless other people. Don't be one of them.
Sarai was getting anxious as she was not bearing any children for Abram, and she blamed God for it (Gen 16:2). So, she took matter into her own hands and gave her handmaid Hagar to Abram. [It is important to note that God didn't tell her to do this, she did it on her own out of impatience. Nowhere in scripture is it said that God spoke to her and told her to do this, nor does it say that Abram was told by God to take Hagar as his mistress.] Abram gave in to his wife's pleadings and slept with Hagar and she bore a son, Ishmael, when Abram was 86 years old. 13 years later, God changed his (Gen 17:5) and his wife's name (Gen 17:15) and then told Abram "I will make thee exceeding fruitful, and I will make nations of thee, and kings shall come out of thee" (Gen 17:6-7). Then, Abraham and Sarah had Isaac, whom the nation of Israel was from. Then, due to jealousy, Sarah demanded that Abraham dismiss Haggar and Ishmael, which grieved Abraham but God said that he would bless them both but to listen to his wife and send them away (Gen 21:12-13). [Now, historically speaking, Ishmael's descendants became modern day Iraq, Afghanistan, Iran, etc. and other Muslim nations]. So, while God did bless Abraham and keep his covenant with His people, Abraham's impatience and questioning God led to the creation of a people that have been battling His people for years.
In King David's case, it was coveting that brought about polygamy, not God. 2 Samuel 11 tells of the time that King David looked upon Bathsheba with lust, arranged for an adulterated meeting, where she became pregnant. Instead of coming clean, he designed a way to have her husband, Uriah, one of King David's champion soldiers to be killed, so that he could hide his sin from the world. "But the thing that David had done displeased Jehovah" (2 Sam 11:27b).
Both of these, and all the other examples of polygamy you might find in the Bible, are hardly examples of God being "okay" with polygamy. Nowhere in these or any other story shows God condoning polygamy. God never commands anyone to marry multiple women, or a woman to an already married man. God made it clear in Genesis how He designed marriage - one man, one woman (Gen 2:22-24).
Argument #1: He didn't tell me not to do it! So, one might make the claim that God allowing these men to do it, or better yet, not commanding them not to, could be interpreted as God being ok with polygamy. However, sin exists, even in the most devout. Need an example? Read the Bible. It is jam packed with examples of everyone being plagued by it. (Everyone, except Jesus of course!) We all know that sin is the polar opposite of God yet God allows for us to go through it for His glory. Polygamy is no different. Just because God allows His people to fall, does not mean that the action is sanctioned by Him. Permitting sin is not the same as condoning sin.
Argument #2: He blessed me so it must be ok! One might then make the blessing argument. "God only blesses the righteous." Since God would never bless a sinful relationship, then the fact that He blessed Ishmael's descendants, or King David's reign, or Abraham, or whoever, proves that they acted within God's laws. The only problem with this argument is that it is totally un-Biblical. Show me the verse in the Bible that says only perfect people receive His blessings? While it is true that God blesses those who have a Biblical marriage, it is also true that He blesses homosexuals, liars, thieves, criminals, atheists, and the Dallas Cowboys. Surely you don't think all of these people are living a holy lifestyle. You see, God blesses whomever He chooses to bless, regardless of status, wealth, and lifestyle. "For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways," declares the LORD." (Isaiah 55:8). "Is it not lawful for me [the LORD] to do what I will with mine own? or is thine eye evil, because I am good?" (Matt. 20:15) God will bless who He wants according to His own desires. Take my life for example. I sin everyday. I break His laws time and time again, yet my wife loves me, my kids love me, I have a great job, and, most importantly, I am saved by the blood of the lamb. I am truly undeservingly blessed beyond measure. If this argument were true and God really worked like this, does that mean that every sin I commit is "ok" in the eyes of God? Of course not.
The truth is, God does not agree with polygamy. Not now, not back in Biblical times, not ever. The Bible says that God never changes (Num 23:19, Heb 13:8, James 1:17), which means neither does His laws or His views. When God created the world, He made one man for one woman. Period. Mankind is the one who introduced polygamy. Mankind is the one who tried to bend the rules. Man is responsible for this perversion of marriage, not God. In my opinion, the Mormon era of polygamy was created because a lot of men were deviants. They wanted more than what God had in store for them, and when they found themselves in a position of power they abused it. They allowed their own selfish desires to control them and led their followers into destructive lifestyles, all in the name of "righteousness".
If you're Mormon, I hope this shakes you to your core. You have been lied to and deceived. Joseph Smith, Brigham Young, and the other prophets were not following God when they decreed polygamy to be permissible by God. That is simply not true.
If you are not Mormon, I hope this has given you a bit more to talk to your Mormon friends about. Let this be a gateway into heavier conversations about the true God and His gospel. Use this information to spread the good news of His glory and bring more lost sheep into His fold.
Lastly, if there is something you can take away, let it be this: Bad things happen to those who go against God's design. Sarah found that out the hard way. So did Abraham. So did David. So have countless other people. Don't be one of them.