After reading her post, I was impressed to do more than just 'like' or 'share.' I also felt that I needed to do more than just leave a comment on her page, even though I did do that. I wanted to do a bit more. So I thought I'd write her a letter and hope that it finds her.
So, Ms. Roberson, this is for you.
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Dear Chandler,
A good friend of mine posted a link to your blog I Believe and after reading only the first few sentences I was immediately hooked. Not only do I love reading personal, heartfelt expressions of faith, but the fact that you are a practicing Mormon was even more enticing. I too struggled with my LDS faith and that struggle led me to the throne of Jesus and leaving the Mormon faith altogether. I, therefore, am always eager to hear/read stories of other members of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints who are going through choppy waters. I want to know what they found out, what they did to overcome whatever it was, and whether or not their faith was strengthened or weakened by their experiences. Your story was no different and I feel privileged to have read it. So, thank you for sharing.
I was intrigued by your story about your friend leaving the LDS Church. I too had people I was close to and admired question and leave the faith. Likewise, my faith was rattled. I can't tell you how glad I was to read when you said, "I wasn't ready to go down without a fight. I prayed. I read. I called some of the most spiritual people I know. I thought of some of the most spiritual people I know." I so love that! You didn't just fall on your parents' opinions, nor your friends'. You used that brain of yours and looked at it from several different angles. Bravo! Too many people don't take the time to investigate their own beliefs and they should!
I hope everyone reading your blog knows and understands how much courage that takes. I would assume from your writings that you are a faithful member and are most likely deeply rooted into the LDS church. To take an honest look at things from the inside is a BIG deal. And to that I commend you Ms. Chandler, and encourage you to not lose that drive!
However, I was very saddened by your next paragraph. Truth be told, I was anxiously waiting to hear what you learned, how God opened your eyes (either in favor of or against) regarding the Church. I wanted to hear God's love and wisdom shine down on you and give you the type of clarity that even LensCrafters can't provide. But you didn't. I don't know if that is because what you learned was private or that you were unable to find anything at all. Either way, I would be very interested to know the fruits of your labors should you decide to write another blog on the subject. Unfortunately, the only thing you provided was:
"If God didn't exist, then I would continue doing exactly what I am doing. Why? Because when lived fully and earnestly, it will make me the best person I can be. Loving, caring, serving, hoping. I would much rather believe in something than believe in nothing."
I have to ask - and forgive me for being so bold - but, where are your principals? Where is your integrity? Why would you stay and cling to a faith that you discovered to be wrong? Why would you choose to raise your current/future family in a church that may be build on a lie? Just staying in a church because it makes you a better person is not a valid reason. For there are 'good' Muslims, Scientologists, Atheists, Christians, Mormons, and Budhists. This is why the Apostle Paul nips this argument in the bud when quotes Isaiah and says that we as a whole human race are not good people (Romans 3:10).
The heart of our issue is not whether we are a 'good' person. The problem is sin. Everyone does it and everyone is guilty of it (Romans 3:23). However, God chose to came down and shower us with His unfailing grace (John 1:14) so that we do not have to endure the eternal consequences of that sin (Matt. 1:21, Rom. 5:8, 1 John 1:9). This gift of eternal salvation is given to us all freely (Eph :8-9) and is found only through the blood of of our savior, Jesus (John 14:6).
Furthermore, we don't go to church - or shouldn't go to church - because we want to be a better person. Church isn't about us. It's about God. We should go to church wanting to know more about Him and His will in our lives. We should go to church because it is a set apart time we make to just sit and worship Him. We should go to church so that we can, as a body of believers, sharpen each other so that we can be used better by God. It is a difference of looking inward (what you described) and looking upward (what I described).
"Either the gospel is true or it's not. I believe it is. ...The way I see it though is if God exists, this is his church."
I do hope you know that Mormonism isn't the only 'gospel' out there. In fact, the gospel I just referenced above is fundamentally different than the gospel that Mormonism teaches. This is not an attack, but an observation of LDS history. Joseph Smith reported that God told him that all the professing churches were false, their doctrines were wrong, and their pastors were corrupt, thus needing Joseph to "restore" the gospel. Joseph Smith started a religion that was different than the other Bible believing churches. You are correct when you said "Either the gospel is true or it is not." However, I need you to know that the good news of Jesus Christ can be true AND the LDS church be wrong.
"I don't care what mistakes were made by members in LDS history anymore. They are only human. And of course it's going to look bad when you compile every poor choice they made into a single document. I sure would hate if someone did that to me, you would probably hate me too!"
People are sinners and we all make mistakes, myself included. However, there is a big difference between a member making a mistake, and a person claiming to speak for God (One who NEVER makes a mistake) making a mistake. If a person claims to be speaking for or on behalf of God (i.e. - "Thus saith the Lord") then that person cannot make a mistake since that would mean that God made a mistake...which He doesn't do! Joseph Smith, Brigham Young, and all the other prophets claimed to speak for God (as they claimed to be Prophets of God). Therefore, you absolutely should care when these guys made a mistake.
"And I have a hard time believing in "facts" because facts seem to always change. The earth was flat, Pangea never existed. Faith in religion is rarely factual, but that's exactly the purpose of faith."
There is a difference between a fact and a theory. People theorized that the earth was flat, that Pangea never existed, etc. Just because it is presented as "fact" doesn't make it so. And so while our faith is based on something that is intangible, God has given us axioms that we can hold to so that our faith isn't just based on a feeling, or a hope. We found original manuscripts of the Bible, and the dead sea scrolls so we know our Bible has validity. We can visit places like Jerusalem, Bethlehem, the River Jordan, the Dead Sea, and other Biblical cities and sites. In fact, if you go to these places, a lot of people (dare I say almost all of them) would tell you that the "evidence" of the person of Jesus is so overwhelming that you would have to be crazy not to believe He was real. Not to mention extra-Biblical sources that tell of a person named Jesus who died on a cross and claimed to be the Christ or Messiah. The point is, we may not be able to prove our faith 100%, but we can make a very strong argument to believe it.
"...being a faithful member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints will do nothing but persuade me to do good continually, it gives me such comfort. Comfort that no "evidence" can take away."
I love your resolve, but I fear that it is found "on rocky places, where it [does] not have much soil. It [springs] up quickly, because the soil [is] shallow. But when the sun [comes] up, the plants were scorched, and they withered because they [have] no root" (Mat 13:5-6). A lot of my friends have made similar claims; that no matter what 'evidence' there was against the Mormon church, they would believe it to be true. Can I just be honest with you and caution you against this type of thinking? I hope you can see how closed off you are to letting the Holy Spirit guide you. If you only hear what you think is best, how can the Holy Spirit work within you?
I also hope you see that you are arguing in circles. On one hand you say that you don't believe facts, or evidences should alter your faith. But then you state that Joseph Smith was handed the plates of brass from God and translated it into the book of Mormon. You claim that God has a plan for us, that God exists, and that basically Mormonism is true. In fact, you testify to it. But you cannot claim to distrust facts and then make unsubstantiated claims and present them as facts. These are two opposing views.
As I look back over my words, I realize that I might sound very harsh. Just know that everything I said is out of love. I don't know if our paths will ever cross and if this is the only thing I will ever say to you, I would rather it be a little bold yet founded in Biblical truth and authority than beat around the bush and have you miss what I believe you need to hear. God loves you so much! You are a wonderful person, made in His image, and he doesn't want you to just be a good person. He doesn't want you to just live a decent life. He came to give you life to the fullest (John 10:10) and that can only be found if you have a relationship with Jesus Christ.
Sister Chandler, I hope my words have not fallen on deaf ears. I would encourage you to keep searching and looking for truth, not for your well being, but for God's glory. Be strong enough to look at everything with an open mind and trusting that God will make your path straight (Prov. 3:5-6). Don't ever be afraid of reading things that challenge your faith. If you examine a piece of doctrine and it's false then you know what to stay away from and your faith is strengthened. If you examine a piece of doctrine and you know it's true, then your faith is still strengthened. It's a can't lose!
I will pray for you. May God grant you wisdom in the years to come so that you may know Him better. Thank you again for sharing your story and your testimony. Have a blessed day.
In Christ,
-Brenton
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